Friday, 28 December 2007

The Presence of The Present

Thanks be unto God for his unspeakable gift
II Cor 9:15

I hope your home today will be filled with joy, laughter and the presence of the loved ones. Perhaps even that eccentric uncle or the cheek-pinching aunt will make their annual appearance.

Children, grand children and maybe even some "greats" will fill the halls of your home with their rapturous echoes of delight. The food, festivities and the fun are all a part of making this day's presence on our calendar memorable.

Of course, the presence of the presents is always a high point at this holiday season. However I sincerely hope and I don't mean ti be sanctimonious that the present of HIS presence will be fully manifest at your house. The presence of the greatest Present ever sent to mankind is the Lord Jesus Christ. He is no longer a Babe in a manger but the coming King of all that exists in Heaven and on earth! What a present God gave the world that first Christmas Day!

Some of you dear readers may be absent from the presence of your loved ones today. The distant miles could not be traversed or scheduling conflicts were too huge to overcome, and you are alone.

Alone?
No, I think not, for the presence of God's greatest Present is with you today, Christ Jesus the Lord.
For He said "Lo, I am with you alway..."

Tim Green

Sunday, 23 December 2007

Christian Fellowship

We had a great time of Christian Fellowship in Pastor Roger Tooley's house right after the Carol service in Orchard house. To my apology, we are not allowed to take any picture in Orchard house and therefore there is no picture of our Carol service there at all. But in summary, we had a great time there and guess what.... they wanted us to come once every month to hold a mini service there!!! What a blessing!!!

So we head to pastor's house and had a little bit of games and chat about before continuing with the food (remember we are baptist... fellowship = food, hahaha!!!).

First... introducing the church crowd.





























And then we have gift exchange... and Lo and behold, here comes... Pastor Christmas to distribute the gifts!!!








































And children busy playing..!! We are INDEED had a great time. Thanks to Country Mama and Pastor for making such a pleasant fellowship. Stay tune for more picture of the the very first Candlelight service in our church.


















Sunday, 16 December 2007

Chrismas Carol Picture!

I'll let the picture do the talking :-)


Geek Wife



Carol Service

We just had our annual Carol Service at the church last night. Everything went well. It is hard sometimes when you do not have your own building to make sure everything makes it's way to the car. When we have special things like this, it makes it even more difficult because you have to take decorations as well. But, all in all I think the room looked very nice for about a 1/2 hour of work.

Talk about nervous! Here we were trying to get everything decorated as quickly as possible (once everything is toted in from the car) so that we have time to run through a few specials that were being sung. Not to mention trying to then give the pianist a chance to warm up also. Talk about a mad 1 hour time frame. Ha! Ha!

In the end it all turned out just fine. We had a few visitors and that was nice. One of our church ladies husband actual came in as well as her mum/mom. She travels about 25 miles to the services (for Americans that is nothing, but for here it is alot) and her lost husband usually sits in the car and waits for her. It was such a blessing to see him come in. Pray the Lord will convict his hard heart and that he will be saved. We had 2 Salvation Army ladies visit. It is nice to know that they will have heard the gospel at least once in their lives. Also, Mr & Mrs. Lane visited with us again. They are the grandparents of one of the young men in the church. They really enjoyed themselves. They stopped off at his house on the way home and was telling his family what a lovely time they had had. His mother was not well pleased. Pray for these folk, as they need the Lord.

We had an added blessing to the service. Bro. Hendy, from Indonesia; was able to be with us last night. It was a blessing to have him in the service. He is an accomplished pianist and played one of the very hard pieces for us. I believe the Lord sent him just for us!! He was sent here (Nottingham) with his job for about a month and was visiting one of the families at church whom he attend school with. He leaves next week and we are grateful to have had the opportunity to meet him and for his willingness to help us.

Pastor did an excellent job preaching the message. It was really good. I know that it gets hard to go think of new ways to present the Christmas Story, but I thank the Lord for the message we heard last night. Some of the lost people had heard it before, but there were some who have never heard and I'm thankful that Pastor tells it straight (with love) and does not beat around the bush. Our society today is hard and calloused, sometime it takes being very direct to get their attention. It just depends on the kind of spirit that is behind the directness. You can say a whole lot more in love than you can get away with if you have a bad spirit about you. Anyway, he did a good job. Thanks, Preacher!!!!

Well, I think I'll go relax for a few minutes until it's time to get ready for church tonight. God bless!

Until the Shout,
Country Mama

Thursday, 13 December 2007

Turning ONE is 2 days!!!

My little 'bandel' of joy (bandel = naugthy in Indonesian) will soon turn ONE year old on 15th December. Guess what.... we had not plan for ANYTHING yet.
What a surprise!


Geek Wife
playing with my chihuahua dog doorstopper


see, this is no eyelashese extension, this is for real *wink wink*

Sunday, 9 December 2007

the controversy around "Christmas tree"


editted by Geek Wife
taken from Wikipedia
(this means that I didn't type ANY of this! On the other hand I am quite SHOCKED on my findings!!! Is this really what secular world think of us fundamentalist? scroll to the bottom most to find my comment)





A Christmas tree, Yule tree or Tannenbaum (German: fir tree) is one of the most popular traditions associated with the celebration of Christmas. It is normally an evergreen coniferous tree that is brought into a home or used in the open, and is decorated with Christmas lights and colourful ornaments during the days around Christmas. An angel or star is often placed at the top of the tree, representing the host of angels or the Star of Bethlehem from the Nativity story.



Roots
With likely origins in European pre-Christian cultures,[1] the Christmas tree has gained an extensive history and become a common sight during the winter season in various countries.

Illustration of Yggdrasil from the Ockelbo Runestone, Sweden.
Patron trees (for example, the Irminsul, Thor's Oak and the figurative Yggdrasil) held special significance for the ancient Germanic tribes, appearing throughout historic accounts as sacred symbols and objects. According to Adam of Bremen, in Scandinavia the Germanic pagan kings sacrificed nine males (the number nine is a significant number in Norse mythology) of each species at the sacred groves every ninth year.[2]

According to Church records, Saint Boniface (who, also according to Church records, had felled the Thor's Oak) attempted to Christianise the indigenous Germanic tribes by introducing the notion of trinity by using the cone-shaped evergreen trees because of their triangular appearance.[3]

Other notable traditions in relation to Christmas have also been derived from Germanic paganism, including the Yule log, Christmas ham, Yule Goat, stuffing stockings[4], elements of Santa Claus and his nightly ride through the sky, and surviving elements of Pre-Christian Alpine traditions in the Alps.
Throughout all the ages, evergreen plants were used for decoration in the winter, from laurel, mistle or conifer, and trees had a cultural importance (cf. maypole).

Origin
A Christmas tree from 1900.
The modern custom can be traced to 16th century Germany, but apart from that, there was neither an identifiable inventor nor a single town to have been the sole trigger for the tradition, which was a popular merge from much older traditions mentioned above; in the Cathedral of Strasbourg in 1539, the church record mentions the erection of a Christmas tree, in that period, the guilds started erecting Christmas trees in front of their houses, which hints to an even earlier tradition in the area. Ingeborg Weber-Kellermann (Marburg professor of European ethnology) found a Bremen guild chronicle of 1570 which reports how a small fir was decorated with apples, nuts, dates, pretzels and paper flowers, and erected in the guild-house, for the benefit of the guild members' children, who collected the dainties on Christmas day. Martin Luther is said to have decorated a small tree in house to symbolise the way the stars shined at night. Another early reference is from Basel, where the tailor apprentices carried around town a tree decorated with apples and cheese in 1597.

During the 17th century, the custom entered family homes. One Strasbourg priest, Johann Konrad Dannerstuart, complains about the custom as distracting from the Word of God.
By the early 18th century, the custom had become common in towns of the upper Rhineland, but it had not yet spread to rural areas. Wax candles are attested from the late 18th century. The Christmas tree remained confined to the upper Rhineland for a relatively long time. It was regarded as a Protestant custom by the Catholic majority along the lower Rhine and was spread there only by Prussian officials who were moved there in the wake of the Congress of Vienna in 1815.

In the early 19th century, the custom became popular among the nobility and spread to royal courts as far as Russia. Princess Henrietta of Nassau-Weilburg introduced the Christmas tree to Vienna in 1816, and the custom spread across Austria in the following years. In France, the first Christmas tree was introduced in 1840 by the duchess of Orleans.

The Queen's Christmas tree at Osborne House. The engraving republished in Godey's Lady's Book, Philadelphia, December 1850
In Britain, the Christmas tree was introduced in the time of the personal union with Hanover, Germany, by king George III's Queen Charlotte of Mecklenburg-Strelitz but did not spread much beyond the royal family. Queen Victoria as a child was familiar with the custom. In her journal for Christmas Eve 1832, the delighted 13-year-old princess wrote, "After dinner...we then went into the drawing-room near the dining-room...There were two large round tables on which were placed two trees hung with lights and sugar ornaments. All the presents being placed round the trees...". After her marriage to her German cousin, Prince Albert, the custom became even more widespread. In 1847, Prince Albert wrote: "I must now seek in the children an echo of what Ernest [his brother] and I were in the old time, of what we felt and thought; and their delight in the Christmas-trees is not less than ours used to be". The generous Prince Stuart also presented large numbers of trees to schools and army barracks at Christmas. Images of the royal family with their Christmas tree at Osborne House were illustrated in English magazines, initially as a woodcut in the Illustrated London News of December 1848, and copied in the United States at Christmas 1850 (illustration, left). Such patriotic prints of the British royal family at Christmas celebrations helped popularise the Christmas tree in Britain and among the Anglophile American upper class.

Several cities in the United States lay claim to that country's first Christmas tree. Windsor Locks, Connecticut, claims that a Hessian soldier put up a Christmas tree in 1777 while imprisoned at the Noden-Reed House, thus making it the home of the first Christmas tree in New England. The "First Christmas Tree in America" is also claimed by Easton, Pennsylvania, where German settlers purportedly erected a Christmas tree in 1816. In his diary, Matthew Zahm of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, recorded the use of a Christmas tree in 1821 -- leading Lancaster to also lay claim to the first Christmas Tree in America. [5]

Other accounts credit Charles Follen, a German immigrant to Boston, for being the first to introduce to America the custom of decorating a Christmas tree.[6] August Imgard, a German immigrant living in Wooster, Ohio, is the first to popularise the practice of decorating a tree. In 1847, Imgard cut a blue spruce tree from a woods outside town, had the Wooster village tinsmith construct a star, and placed the tree in his house, decorating it with paper ornaments and candy canes. The National Confectioners' Association [7] officially recognises Imgard as the first ever to put candy canes on a Christmas tree; the canes were all-white, with no red stripes. Imgard is buried in the Wooster Cemetery, and every year, a large pine tree above his grave is lit with Christmas lights.

Many cities, towns, and department stores put up public Christmas trees outdoors for everyone to enjoy, such as the Rich's Great Tree in Atlanta, the Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree in New York City and the large Christmas tree at Victoria Square in Adelaide. During most of the 1970s and 1980s, the largest Christmas tree in the world was put up every year on the property of The National Enquirer in Lantana, Florida. This tradition grew into one of the most spectacular and celebrated events in the history of southern Florida, but was discontinued on the death of the paper's founder in the late 1980s.

In some cities festivals are organised around the decoration and display of multiple trees as charity events. In some cases the trees represent special commemorative gifts, such as in Trafalgar Square in London, where the City of Oslo, Norway presents a tree to the people of London as a token of appreciation for the British support of Norwegian resistance during the Second World War; in Boston, where the tree is a gift from the province of Nova Scotia, in thanks for rapid deployment of supplies and rescuers to the 1917 ammunition ship explosion that leveled the city of Halifax; and in Newcastle upon Tyne, where the 15m-tall main civic Christmas tree is an annual gift from the city of Bergen, Norway, in thanks for the part played by soldiers from Newcastle in liberating Bergen from Nazi occupation.[8]

The United States' National Christmas Tree is lit each year south of the White House in Washington, D.C. Today, the lighting of the National Tree is part of what has become a major holiday event at the White House. President Jimmy Carter lit only the crowning star atop the Tree in 1979 in honour of the Americans being held hostage in Iran; in 1980, the tree was fully lit for only 417 seconds, one second for each day the hostages had been in captivity.
The term Charlie Brown Christmas tree is used in the USA to describe any sad-looking, malformed little tree. Some tree buyers intentionally adopt such trees, feeling sympathetic to their plights. The term comes from the appearance of Charlie Brown's Christmas tree in the TV special A Charlie Brown Christmas.

In New Zealand, Pōhutukawa trees are described as 'natural Christmas trees', as they bloom at Christmas time, and they look like Christmas trees with their red flowers and green foliage.The christmas colours are yellow green and white.



Controversy
The Christmas tree has seen an amount of controversy, mainly involving the secular and non-secular usage of the tree as well as groups who oppose usage of the tree on the grounds of interpretation of scripture and claimed pagan origins and/or pagan character of the custom. There are also those who view it as a Christian symbol. In 2005, the city of Boston renamed the spruce tree used to decorate the Boston Common a "Holiday Tree" rather than a "Christmas Tree". The name change drew poor reviews from the public and was changed back to "Christmas Tree" after being threatened with several lawsuits by Rev. Jerry Falwell and the Alliance Defense Fund. In the same year, Speaker of the House, Dennis Hastert, R-Ill., asked that the tree that decorates the Capitol grounds to be renamed back to "Christmas tree". It had been renamed "Holiday tree" in the 90s.[16]

Christianity
Jeremiah 10:1-5 in the Bible says the following (KJV):

[1] Hear ye the word which the LORD speaketh unto you, O house of Israel:
[2] Thus saith the LORD, Learn not the way of the heathen, and be not dismayed at the signs of heaven; for the heathen are dismayed at them.
[3] For the customs of the people are vain: for one cutteth a tree out of the forest, the work of the hands of the workman, with the axe.
[4] They deck it with silver and with gold; they fasten it with nails and with hammers, that it move not.
[5] They are upright as the palm tree, but speak not: they must needs be borne, because they cannot go. Be not afraid of them; for they cannot do evil, neither also is it in them to do good.

This is interpreted by some fundamentalist Christians as referring to a Christmas tree, and that therefore the Bible would explicitly forbid the practice. However, the more common interpretation is that the passage refers to idol worship, and it is the practice of making an object out of wood, silver, and gold, and then worshiping that idol, which is pagan.

Others feel that since "Christmas Trees" are not biblically ordained, they should not be used.

Such individuals and Christian denominations are unlikely to celebrate Christmas at all, for the same reason, such as the United Church of God.

Martin Collins from Bibletools.com believes that that the origin of the Christmas tree is tied to the ancient myth of Gilgamesh and Horus,[17] which they associate with character Nimrod in the Bible. Interestingly, that association places the origins of the Christmas tree in to a celebration Nimrod as the "Son of Heaven." By associating this symbol with Jesus, many Christians are replacing that pagan symbology with a Christian one by celebrating the Birth of Jesus on December 25th instead of the Birthday of Nimrod.

Most churches however use Christmas trees as decoration at Christmas time. Some churches use the same stripped Christmas tree as a Christian cross at Easter. See the Old English poem The Dream of the Rood. Both Ezekiel 47:12 and the Book of Revelation 22:2 use trees as a symbol of new fruitful life, comparative to the Tree of life denied Adam in Genesis 3:22-23. Paul makes the link between Adam and Christ clear in Romans chapter 5:

Adam is a type of the one who was to come. (v. 14)

In the same way the Christmas tree can be seen as mirroring the tree of life, a symbol or type of the Crucifix which brings redemption.

Syncretising traditions in Northern Spain, the Bilbao airport displays the foreign tree and the Basque Olentzero.
In some Catholic countries, the tree is seen as a recent Protestant or American influence detracting from the Mediterranean traditions of the Christmas crib. However in many Catholic homes, both types of decoration coexist.

*****

Geek Wife note : I actually had nothing against someone to put up Christmas tree, even after reading this article (but its quite shocking to me that wikipedia, the most famous encyclopedia on the internet mention what some fundamentalist view about it). Even though I don't put up christmas tree and this is my confiction, I certainly WON'T look down on one who does!!
God sees heart and not just the outward appearance. Just like when my pastor preaching about working on sabbath day. Many fundamentalist fail to know this and became like the pharisee. I know there is millions of christian that doesn't know what's behind christmas day, christmas tree, mistletoe etc, and I would think that God won't blame them for not reading wikipedia to learn that many things about christmas is actually pagan! It's became plain WRONG if you place all this things (decoration, gift, celebration) BEFORE the real meaning of christmas, that is the birth of the Saviour.

Friday, 7 December 2007

Standing on the promises!

Standing on the promises of Christ my King,
through eternal ages let his praises ring;
glory in the highest, I will shout and sing,
standing on the promises of God.

Standing on the promises that cannot fail,
when the howling storms of doubt and fear assail,
by the living Word of God I shall prevail,
standing on the promises of God.

Standing on the promises of Christ the Lord,
bound to him eternally by love's strong cord,
overcoming daily with the Spirit's sword,
standing on the promises of God.

Standing on the promises I cannot fall,
listening every moment to the Spirit's call,
resting in my Savior as my all in all,
standing on the promises of God.

Standing, standing,
standing on the promises of Christ my Savior;
standing, standing,
I'm standing on the promises of God.

Josiah is officially can STAND (for 3 minutes 45 seconds without holding my hand)
Praise the Lord!

Geek Wife

Wednesday, 5 December 2007

Six Types of Tongues Part 6

So far we have covered:


1) a backbiting tongue
2) a deceitful, lying tongue
3) a froward tongue
4) a naughty tongue
5) a perverse tongue


We will finish this series on a positive note. All of the above do not look very inviting, does the Lord have anything good to say about the tongue? Yes, and we will look at take a few minutes to look at it.



A Wholesome Tongue


Proverbs 15:4: "A wholesome tongue is a treasure of life: but perverseness therein is a breach in the spirit."

In contrast to the five other types of tongues previously studied, a wholesome tongue is a breath of fresh air or, as today's text describes it, a "tree of life." Unlike, the froward, perverse, naughty, deceitful and backbiting tongues, the wholesome tongue edifies or builds up other people. It refuses to speak deceitfully, hypocritically, selfishly or boastfully. The believer who possesses a wholesome tongue will "[keep] his soul from troubles" (Prov. 21:23). Just as the other types of tongues expose the true attitude of a wicked, deceitful heart, a wholesome tongue reveals a heart that is in conformity to the will of God, a heart that seeks to reflect the mind of Christ through words and actions that edify others.


The word wholesome in today's text is especially noteworthy, for the Hebrew word from which it is translated provides us with the key to discovering one of the primary purposes for possessing such a tongue. "A wholesome tongue" can also be rendered "a healing tongue." Rather than trying to tear others down, believers need to speak words of comfort, bearing one another's burdens and restoring those who are "overtaken in a fault" (Gal. 6:1-2). Imagine how much more pleasant life would be if we would use our tongues to heal rather than hurt. Of course, sometimes in order to "restore" an errant believer, words of rebuke are necessary. Nevertheless, every word we speak should be "with grace, seasoned with salt" (Col. 4:6), accomplished in a spirit of love (Eph. 4:15). Does the Lord view our speech as a putrefying "open sepluchre" (Romans 3:13) or as a beautiful "tree of life"?

Well, that is the end of our series. I pray it has been as much a help to you as it has been to me. I wonder what kind of tongue to we have? Some food for thought I reckon.

Until next time,

Country Mama

Six Types of Tongues Part 5

We are now on # 5, and I am sorry that there has been such a long time in between them. Maybe things will slow down again after the first of the year, but who knows!

A Perverse Tongue

Proverbs 17:20: "He that hath a froward heart findeth no good: and he that hath a perverse tongue falleth into mischief."

The word perverse in today's text means "overturned" or "changed." A perverse tongue, therefore, is one that distorts, changes or perverts that which is true. This tongue differs from many of the other tongues previously studied in that a perverse tongue does not necessarily involve spitefulness or intentional harm directed toward another person. Regardless of motive, all one needs to do in order to speak with a perverse tongue is to intentionally lie about someone or something. Despite the fact that many today often accept and sometimes even glorify dishonesty, God does not treat duplicity or deceitfulness lightly. In fact, He says He hates such wickedness and defines a "lying tongue" and "a false witness that speaketh lies" as and "abomination" to Him (Proverbs 16:16-19). Today's text presents the consequences of speaking with such a tongue --"He that hath a perverse tongue falleth into mischief."

Probably many of us have already learned the hard way that one lie often leads to another, and before we know it, we find ourselves in a terrible mess that could have been avoided had we only spoken the truth in the first place. While telling the truth may sometimes cause heartache and pain, lying will surely cause even greater distress, not only in our relationships with others but also in our relationship with God. By guarding our mouths against lying words, we "[keep our] soul from troubles" (Prov. 21:23) and keep our hearts pure and blameless before the Lord. As children of God, we must be careful that we "lie not one to another" (Col. 3:9), for a perverse tongue will result in calamity and inevitable chastisement from our Heavenly Father.

Something to think about,
Country Mama

I did NOT get lost!

Howdy everyone! I bet you all thought that I had gotten lost somewhere in cyber space. Well, no such luck. November was crazy and December is not looking any better, so I figured I'd better get to finishing my series on tongues. It is coming right up.

Talk to you soon,
Country Mama

Monday, 3 December 2007

Freedom

by Geek Wife
dedicated to Lord Jesus

Many things in this World PROMISED Freedom
But only Truth GUARANTEES Freedom


And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.
John 8:32

Tuesday, 27 November 2007

A travel warning

forwarded by Geek Wife
A bit of useful advice - verified by the Dorset Police


The number does work from a mobile. This actually happened to someone's daughter.
Lauren was 19 yrs old and in college. This story takes place over the Christmas/New Year's holiday break. It was the Saturday before New Year and it was about 1.00pm in the afternoon, and Lauren was driving to visit a friend, when an UNMARKED police car pulled up behind her and put its lights on.

I would imagine this how unmarked police car looks


Lauren's parents have 4 children (of various ages) and have always told them never to pull over for an unmarked car on the side of the road, but rather wait until they get to a service station, etc So Lauren remembered her parents' advice, and telephoned 112 from her mobile phone. This connected her to the police dispatcher she told the dispatcher that there was an unmarked police car with a flashing red light on his rooftop behind her and that she would not pull over right away but wait until she was in a service station or busy area.

while here is the marked police car

The dispatcher checked to see if there was a police car where she was and there wasn't and he told her to keep driving, remain calm and that he had back-up already on the way. Ten minutes later 4 police cars surrounded her and the unmarked car behind her.
One policeman went to her side and the others surrounded the car behind. They pulled the guy from the car and tackled him to the ground...... ..the man was a convicted rapist and wanted for other crimes. I never knew that bit of advice, but especially for a woman alone in a car, you do not have to pull over for an UNMARKED car.

Apparently police have to respect your right to keep going to a "safe" place. You obviously need to make some signals that you acknowledge them I.e., put on your hazard lights) or call 112 like Lauren did.

Too bad the mobile phone companies don't give you this little bit of wonderful information. So now it's your turn to let your friends know about 112 (112 is an emergency number on your mobile that takes you straight to the police because 999 does not work if you have no signal). This is good information that I did not know!

Please pass on to all your friends, especially any females.

Monday, 26 November 2007

Interruption


My husband made this :-)
I thought it's pretty neat stuff and decided to let the world know about it..!!!
Geek Wife

Sunday, 25 November 2007

When woman's love is betrayed (part 3)

Written by Geek Wife

Before I start to blog about this topic. I was reading this blog http://www.mylittlenewhope2.blogspot.com/ couple of days back, passed by one of my MSN contact. It's a blog by a broken-hearted wife whose husband left her for another 'attractive' colleagues of his. Believe me, this is may be the dozen'th time I heard such story. I do wonder in my mind, "how could he did that?"


So I did a bit of research, and found these : http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/messages/5/446443.html?1186537631

http://www.singaporebrides.com/forumboard/messages/5/415510.html?1162649300

Those stories are REAL stories from women whose been cheated by their husbands. The more I read, my emotion start to boil to 100 centigrade. At least 70% of them was cheated WHILE they are pregnant. And most those men DENY when the wife ask about their affair. What a coward. If you ask me at that point (while reading those thread) who is deserve to go to hell... I think I would answer those adulterous husbands...!! But, here is my second thought.


The bible example.

And Laban had two daughters: the name of the elder was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel.
Leah was tender eyed; but Rachel was beautiful and well favoured....


And he went in also unto Rachel, and he loved also Rachel more than Leah, and served with him yet seven other years.
And when the LORD saw that Leah was hated, he opened her womb: but Rachel was barren.
And Leah conceived, and bare a son, and she called his name Reuben: for she said, Surely the LORD hath looked upon my affliction; now therefore my husband will love me.

Gen 29 : 16-17,30-32





And Jacob came out of the field in the evening, and Leah went out to meet him, and said, Thou must come in unto me; for surely I have hired thee with my son's mandrakes. And he lay with her that night.
And God hearkened unto Leah, and she conceived, and bare Jacob the fifth son.
And Leah said, God hath given me my hire, because I have given my maiden to my husband: and she called his name Issachar.
And Leah conceived again, and bare Jacob the sixth son.
And Leah said, God hath endued me with a good dowry; now will my husband dwell with me, because I have born him six sons: and she called his name Zebulun.

Gen 30 : 16 -20


Here is a classic old time example. Yes, you might scream that it's their own fault that they practiced poligamy. But try to see things on Leah prespective. She is so broken-hearted because her husband doesn't love her, and instead go for his lust and fell crazy for her sister whom described as beautiful and well favoured. You might argue that Jacob wanted Rachel in the first place but was cheated by Laban and gave him Leah instead. Yet remember that God's will is not always aligned with human will. It's God plan for Jacob to wed Leah, because through one of her child Jesus Christ was born. But Jacob still after his own heart and wanted to have Rachel. His decision has cause unnecessary sorrow and heartaches.

Have you done your bit of being a good godly wife?
If you has done your best to be a good wife, you had done your part. It's another story if you has not done your bit and therefore compeling him to look for another 'resources' outside home. But if you had done what you can and being a submissive and loving wife/mother to your children, his affair has nothing to do with you.

However, I did see a pattern. Men tend to repeat their habit of "having affair" more than just once. It's an addiction, he keeps come back for more.

I did ask my husband about it. To his point of view, man and woman are different. It's just like our fondness to buy clothes, bags and shoes, the same way men feels about having a woman.... one is just not ENOUGH. I wanted to argue why he thinks that woman is like an asset (he compared me with bags...!!!) But it's plain to see, us woman doesn't think buying clothes, accessories, shoes, bags, cosmetics, furniture, childrens's clothes, furniture (and the list goes on...and on) again and again is wrong. My husband doesn't see it that way, to him, excessive buying (means buying without any 'needs' behind, which most of the case is) is just plain wrong, it's wasting of money. In other words, it's natural for us to lust in shopping mall wanting stuff that we already have the same way for men to lust seeing a woman even though he already have one!


Another input from my husband : for men, having physical relationship does not equate love, while women tends to think that way.


Divorce doesn't solve anything.
I do wanted to type "you better go and divorce that useless man" many many times while reading the links I pasted above. But after a second thought, I think those words come out of my bitter and hateful heart. Recalling my previous post about "Interview with Karen" she is right to point out that 'forgiveness' is the choice that sets her free from her bitterness past and present life and move on. It doesn't matter whether he repent from his sins, forgiveness is a one way deal. Put it this way, forgiveness is God's way to heal your sorrow. It's easier said than done, but I must testify that I've been through this road before and I've been blessed doing my part (forgiving him) and trusting everthing else into God's hand. Trust me it works! Afterall, God hated divorce... what He had put together no human can put asunder!

Only God can change him.
Many women wonder how can they change their husband. While many found them repenting and in matter of weeks is doing the same old sin, the answer is the change must be from the inside and not the outside. You can't change your husband, only God can change him from inside. Pray for him faithfully, let God deals with his sins and his heart.

If you are reading this and you are not Christian.
All human are sinner, and Jesus Christ died for our transgression far before we even say 'I am sorry'. If you think your spouses has offended you, let me tell you that we had offended God evenmore. He is a holy God, even a white-lie is a big stain in His eyes. He simply can not tolerate ANY sins. But God exceeding love for us has sent us His one and only son, to be punished in exchange for our sins.



But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

Much more then, being now justified by his blood, we shall be saved from wrath through him.

For if, when we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, being reconciled, we shall be saved by his life. And not only so, but we also joy in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, by whom we have now received the atonement.

Rom 5:8-11


God loves us more than our spouse's love, more than our parents' love. He loves us even when we are his ENEMIES..!!! Receive Him as your only saviour today. Let Him comfort of your soul. And let Him mended your broken spirit.

Saturday, 24 November 2007

When woman's love is betrayed (part 2)

I waited patiently for the LORD; and he inclined unto me, and heard my cry. He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings. And he hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear, and shall trust in the LORD.
Psalm 40 : 1-3
editted by Geek Wife


*****

EMILY'S STORY


I write this out of love. Love for the porn addict, love for his wife, and most of all for the children.

I pray this chapter is used for God’s glory and honor, that it might somehow prevent families from being destroyed.

I remember listening to a panel of women James Dobson had on his radio program. They talked about being married for over 20 years and discovering their husbands were involved in pornography. It seemed so unfathomable to me that someone could be deceived for so long. I remember thinking how stupid those women were.

Little did I realize I would be one of those women less than a month later.It was like a birth process. Pain, agony, sweat, tears, hours of intense hurt, and finally truth.

My husband is a porn addict. I heard it. I reacted. For two weeks I was numb. Numb to after 20+ years knowing something was wrong, but not knowing what. A relief to finally know the truth. A relief to now live in reality – in light and truth rather than the unreality of darkness and deception.

*****

My husband would never tell me the secrets of his past before our marriage. I always thought if I loved him enough some day he would tell me. If I loved him enough. . . .We always had a difficult marriage. My husband was always withdrawn and quiet.

I thought I could help him. I was outgoing, attractive, and spontaneous. In our marriage I could never do anything good enough. I was constantly criticized and put down. I thought it was me so I started a self-improvement program, more counseling, more seminars. I learned more was never enough.

My world stopped, knowing something had died in me.My husband always seemed to be “tuned out” – in another world. He worked long hours and often fell into bed at 2 a.m. I missed him. I begged him to come home.I raised the kids as he pursued his career. I told myself I needed to help him.

I poured my heart and soul into his endeavor – supporting and encouraging. There were still problems. When he was home he would go into his office and read his books, newspapers, and reports, and again I would cry myself to sleep.

I had others confront him. I gave this man every chance to tell me about his pornography addiction.

Lies weave other lies. Secrets kill. Comparisons kill.

I feel every time he looked at an image and masturbated he took away a part of me that God intended to be mine. I remember seeing him masturbate and he was in his own world, set on his own pleasure, stimulated and excited by images of women he didn’t know.

It was a feeling of betrayal and heart-wrenching emptiness that a woman feels when she learns that her husband is living a lie. Pornography tears at the very thread of a woman and her femininity. My heart was ripped and uprooted – thrown somewhere into a desert with no place to find refuge. It’s as if I wasn’t enough. Not sexy enough. Not beautiful enough. Not thin enough. Not exciting enough. Women get significance from their relationships with their husbands and when he turns to another for satisfaction it cuts her deeply at the core.I started buying sexy nighties, acting sexier, and suddenly I realized I was bowing down to an idol. It hurt that he chose not to tell me . . . to not allow me to come alongside him as his helper.

*****

To this day he refuses to see the pain that he caused. It amazes me as a wife how we are involved in every other area of a man’s life – his profit margin, his ability to manage, everything – but when it comes to pornography, it’s hidden in deception.

A man’s way seems right to a man.

Porn addiction is very selfish. It takes and takes and doesn’t give back. It’s all for the user’s pleasure.Another lie is that porn does not hurt anyone. Such a web of deception. “And they, having become callous, have given themselves over to sensuality, for the practice of every kind of impurity with greediness” (Eph. 4:19).

There are consequences and the stakes get higher. It takes one lie to cover another. It saddens me how men can compartmentalize this sin. He has the little wife over here with precious children and this nasty sin over here for his private time, justifying it because he still loves his wife and children. You can’t walk simultaneously in the darkness and the light.I’m a wife. I’m a wife of a porn addict.

I’m relieved to know what it is, though I always knew something was wrong. Tears. Pain. Disgust. Betrayal. To face the death of a husband would be better than this. A widow has the support of the church. A porn addict leaves shame and divorce. It would be easier if he were dead. We wouldn’t have to face the public humiliation and shame.

******

Today is a new day. It’s early morning and I must get breakfast for my children. I take each day as it comes now. Just for today. My husband still chooses his sin and refuses to take responsibility for it. I have to let him go and let the Lord deal with him.

I can no longer be his excuse, his enabler.
It’s a new day and I’m moving on and my Deliver is by my side.

He is faithful. He will never leave me nor forsake me.
He will never break His promise.


To a woman who has been betrayed, this is my comfort.

Hear my cry.
Emily



This is the final chapter of a new book called The Silent War (New Leaf Press, 2000). The book was written by Henry J. Rogers, the chaplain of Interstate Batteries.

Friday, 23 November 2007

When a woman's love is betrayed...

Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord,
how oft shall my brother sin against me,
and I forgive him? till seven times?
Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times:

but, Until seventy times seven...

Matthew 18 : 21 -22
*****

BY AUGUSTINE PANG
editted by Geek Wife



Interview with "Karen"
A great today's example of forgiveness
based on true story in Singapore



WHEN Karen got married, she made a VOW: In sickness and in health, till death do us part...
She took those words to heart. Even under the most cruel of circumstances, in a time of betrayal.

You would never have imagined how a happy marriage could end so tragically. When she spoke about it, the otherwise strong woman broke down and wept. Again and again.

Put yourself in her shoes.

You have three wonderful children. Your husband takes good care of the family. He loves you and the children, and works hard so all of you can live in reasonable comfort. In other words, a perfect marriage. What more could a woman ask for? Sure, Karen (not her real name), 50, had the usual worries, like her children's education and their careers. But her husband was the pillar on which she leaned. After all, they had been married for 28 years.

Then the pillar came crashing down.
*****

"It was sometime in 1996. A relative was in hospital and needed extra blood. I offered to help. But a month later, the hospital called.

"The staff told me to go down. I was puzzled. I thought my blood group matched my relative's."

The staff and a doctor sat Karen down. They tried to be nice. But they had to ask that inevitable question.

"You're married, but did you have a boyfriend?" the staff asked Karen.
"No, why? I only have my husband," said Karen.
"Are you sure?" the staff asked again.
"Yes, of course," said Karen, sounding a little agitated. "What's wrong?"
The staff paused, and with a deep sigh, said: "I'm sorry, we've examined your blood and you've got HIV".

Karen could not believe her ears.
"How can it be? I only sleep with my husband and I didn't have any blood transfusion," she said, almost in tears.

The staff said: "Maybe we should test your husband's blood."

Her husband, a marketing manager, agreed to be tested.
A few weeks later, the results arrived. It was confirmed: Her husband had full-blown Aids.
Karen said: "I saw my world collapse around me ... I was very, very angry. He didn't say anything."

*****

One day, out of the blue, she discovered the horrible truth: The man she loved, adored and cherished had, in moments of indiscretion, slept with other women when he travelled overseas.

And he had come back with Aids.

Worse, he had passed that dreaded disease to her.

She is now stricken with HIV, the human immunodeficiency virus, which leads to Aids. Overnight, Karen became a statistic in the Ministry of Health records. Of the 930 people living either with the full-blown Aids or the Aids virus, 73 are wives.
Innocent women who were betrayed twice over by their husbands, who slept with other women and then callously put their wives at risk. Most of these women got the disease from their husbands, a spokesman from Action for Aids (AfA) told The New Paper on Sunday.

Karen is one of them.

What did she do? Did she leave him? After all, she had every right to do so.
Karen did exactly the opposite. Instead of allowing her anger to fester, she rose above herself, above her husband's infidelity, above an uncertain future, and cared for him - until he died.

Hers is an inspiring story of forgiveness. Of reconciliation. Of strength. Of courage.

HOW DID IT TURN OUT THIS WAY?
"What's the point of asking. Why ask why? Can the whys make me or him live longer? The angrier I got, the more I didn't want to ask him.

"My children asked me to divorce him. But I didn't feel it was right. Marriage is for life, it's sacred.

"Yes, he did a horrible thing. But he gets punished, too. And his is not just physical torture. He passed the disease to me. He suffered mentally as well."

Karen is not any ignorant wife. She is educated, speaks very well and once worked as an administrator in an MNC. Her three children are in their early teens to early 20s. The family lives in a five-room flat. There was no hint of bitterness in her replies when she spoke to TNP on Sunday. In fact she still kept referring to him as "my husband".

Every time she recalled the good times she had with him, or what good a father he was, she wept. She recalled watching her husband wither away.
As the days drew on, her husband grew thinner and weaker. He left his well-paying job.
In the last six months of his life, he was in and out of hospital.

"I would visit him early in the morning before I started work. After work, I would be there, till 10pm. My entire weekends were spent there."

Karen's 15-year-old daughter said: "My mum would specially cook nutritious meals for my dad.
"Sometimes, he ate only a few spoonsful because he had no appetite. But she made sure he did not go hungry.

"And she talked to him, a lot, just to keep his spirits up. She was on call 24 hours a day, even though she herself had HIV."

Care-giver Ms Pang said: "She (Karen) hardly uttered a single word of complaint... To think that she is the victim."

Karen's husband came down with bronchitis. Towards the end, his lungs and heart failed him.
From a well-built 70 kg, he was reduced to 43 kg.
One early morning in December last year, he died in his hospital bed. He was 54.


THE FUTURE
"It's tough without my husband. I have to do many things which he used to do. The children still need their father. Now, I try to be both father and mother. It's not easy."

Karen controls her HIV-infection through medication. She looks perfectly normal, though she does feel weak sometimes. Now, she devotes her time to her children and keeps herself occupied with activities so that she doesn't have time to think of the past.

How long did the doctors say you can live?
"They say I can live till a ripe old age. But I don't think so. I don't feel weak, but you never know."

What's going to happen to your children if you die?
"The older ones will have to take care of the younger ones. Their security will be this flat," said Karen, pointing to the well-furnished and tidy flat.

I asked her daughter: "Don't you hate your dad for leaving the family in this state?"

She said: "I'm not angry, I just thought it was a stupid thing (to sleep with other women) to do. Since I can't retrace the steps, I just have to make the best of the situation."

Karen said: "As a mother, I don't plant bad thoughts into my children's minds.
"Why bring so much hatred to them? They might just grow up hating their father, and hating men. That's not how I want them to grow up.

As I left her flat, I asked Karen: "What keeps you going?"
"God. He's my strength."

Wednesday, 21 November 2007

I Thank God.. I am NOT a Turkey!







Happy thanksgiving to those who celebrate it..!!!
Geek Wife



Friday, 16 November 2007

Going to The Dogs

taken from Baptist Bread (by Tim Green)
"...that I might by all means saved some." I Cor 9:22b

A man was confronted by a stray dog that had suffered a broken leg. This Samaritan-like fellow took the dog to a veterinarian and paid to have the homeless mutt's leg attended to, it was set by the vet and soon healed.

Some months passed abd this "healed" dog showed up at the pet doctpr's office with another dog that had broken leg..!!!!

Now, how could a DOG figure that out?!
I guess they are smarter than some of us give them credit for.

The thought I'd like to leave with you today to ponder is this :
You have been helped, why not get someone else to the Helper?
You have been saved, why not get someone else to the Saviour?
If a canine had enough "conviction" to believe that the same doctor that helped him might just be able to cure his companion, don't you think as a converted, committed Christian that Christ could help some of your friends?

Our text teaches us that by all means we should endeavor to reach the lost with the Gospel that changed our lives. Paul said he became weak to the weak and was available to be "made all things to all men". His goal was to see folk saved and that should be the highest priority of ever born again "dog" that has received a crumb from the Master's table.

David Cloud

written by Geek Wife


What happen recently triggers me to write something about him.Yes, pastor David Cloud. He is definetely not a new name for a fundamentalist Baptist.But believe it or not, "many" baptist dislike his "negative" comment (or may be should say attitude) especially towards other saved-but-may-be-not-a-fundamentalist Christian.

Well, first of all, believe me... I did not side him because he is one of my pastor's good friend. In fact, sometimes I do tend to think as many other his 'hater'. These is some of the example that I've heard or read

"Can you stop complaining and do something about it?

Stop being negative...! Afterall it's just a small mistake compared to what that man had done, he produce a lot of Godly books.

Oh please don't say that bro. Cloud, you will have tons of enemies...!!!

Do this, you can try to google name "David Cloud" and it will come with TONS of critics and blog with many flashing word of disagreement. But what is it the purpose of his ministry? Is he really looking for enemy or just try to become popular by posting controversial stuff?

Obviously enough, Pastor Cloud, as a human, he CAN make mistakes too. Like this one for example on this blog written by another fundamentalist :
http://ebaptist.blogspot.com/2007/09/on-dishonesty-of-david-cloud.html
But needless to say, this is only a one side picture and Pastor Cloud (whether or not he thinks he had make mistake) has his side of a story to tell.

But enough of saying OTHERS prespective on him. This is what I think.

Last night I was reading Jeremiah when my husband was reading the literature Pastor Roger Tooley printed out for us. (FYI, it was Pastor David Cloud literature). And my husband said to me :
"Sometimes I feel I need to quit reading this literature. Everything sounds so negative and discouraging".
"That's true". I replied.
"Wonders why he decide to have this kind of ministry, would he feel so terrible himself then writting all these ? I feel awful inside just reading them."
Then both of us absorbed reading our own stuff.

"Hey... isn't Jeremiah sounded like Pastor Cloud?"

That's right, in fact, not only Jeremiah, but MANY other phropets, judges, apostle and even the Lord Himself rebuke other LOADS of times. The word 'rebuke' appear in the bible 119 times, and go count yourself for the word 'Woe'. So, why all these Godly man are so negative and sometimes sound overly judgemental?

It's because we, just like the Jew... are a stubborn, sinful, human. Needless to say that the same prophet need to warn the Jew numerous times over THE SAME THING. Ananias and Safira end up dead because they lied to the Holy Spirit (which to my standart I would say : I will close my ear as long as I got THE money).

So, a lesson to learn. We should be thankful there is a minister like Pastor Cloud who run this kind of ministry. It's not easy when another Christian (who include fundamentalist) thinks you are just over judging them, being too negative, or even talking nonsense while actually you tried to restore their relationship with the Lord.

My piece of advice is : if you happen to get his 'strong' word (or may be its directed to someone you know) just try to see is there a truth in it. If no, I believe He is not a unreasonable man whereby you can go to him and straight things up (If you have a ground to say). The bottom line is, it's not easy to become the enemy of this world... do pray for Pastor Cloud.